by Craig Thompson

The recent controversy surrounding singer R. Kelly and his sexual exploits has drawn a great deal of attention to the entertainer and his relationships with women. In addition, Mr. Kelly has become the poster child for the issue of child sex abuse and pornography. Unfortunately, too many of us are focusing solely on Mr. Kelly and the videotapes that are causing a stir across the globe (incidentally, many people are downloading this video from the internet - if they know or have reason to believe that he is with a minor in the video, isn't downloading the video a violation of the law as well?). While we stand gazing at what promises to be a drama of Hollywood proportions unfold, the broader issues surrounding how our young girls are being treated is passing us by.

I, like many of us, was somewhat surprised by the number of allegations levied against Mr. Kelly; however, few who have followed his career can actually say they were surprised by the substance of the accusations, because we have seen signs of certain behavior in the past. What should be of concern is the fact that what is being played out on radio shows and news stations across the country is occurring in cities across the country at an alarming rate. Young girls are becoming the objects of affection and lust of older men, and we are slowly moving into the latest manifestation of "innocence lost."

On my radio show, I recently interviewed a psychologist who counsels child sex abusers, and he advised the listeners that the problem of child sex abuse is now of epidemic proportions. He indicated that many of our girls are being seduced and tricked by men (predators) who are using their age and fake "maturity" to satisfy their own egos and desires for authority. He stated that many people do not talk about this problem, and unfortunately, it is becoming the silent psychological killer of many young girls.

The discussion topics during the R. Kelly saga must extend beyond his alleged desire to press the "record" button while living out his sexual fantasies. More importantly, we must seriously discuss important topics such as self-esteem, self-worth, fatherlessness, sexual responsibility, social mores and accountability. Each of these topics will be addressed in future columns. It is critical that we, collectively, deal with the pathologies that lead to risky and even illegal behavior, as well as dealing with the manifestations of those pathologies.

In addition, we must stop making crazy excuses for people in our community, Mr. Kelly included, who demonstrate questionable behavior that damage the fibre and foundation of our future. As the drama unfolds, let's remember that the challenges we face regarding child sex abuse are much bigger than R. Kelly. Let's make sure we reserve some energy to deal with the larger problem. Then, when the Court TV broadcast ends, we will still view it as a significant problem to be addressed. The window is wide open - this is a perfect time for us to talk about ways to save our young girls.

Craig Thompson is an attorney, lecturer, writer and host of weekly radio and television shows. At age 32, Craig is a highly sought after public speaker, addressing topics such as leadership, goal setting and self-esteem. He has spoken across the country at churches, schools, colleges and to civic organizations. He can be reached at cathompson42001@yahoo.com